Movie Review #13: Wolf of Wall Street

I found this pic here but it was originally by crqsf and posted to gushmag.it

You know I never thought a movie would offend me, but there is just something about seeing a man sniff cocaine from a woman's lower extremities as an opening shot to a film that just rubs me the wrong way.

Don't get me wrong, it's a great attention getter, but I would like to be warmed up to the use of drugs in the movie. It threw me off quite a bit, and to be honest, I didn't like it.

But enough about the complaints, here's a review of Scorcese's Wolf of Wall Street.

ACTING
The performances in this film were top notch. It's no surprise that Leo D got an Oscar nod from his character in WOWS. Seriously. Like I was afraid that he might have actually overdosed at some points in real life because it was just so realistic. That and Jonah Hill was hilarious as always and made majority of the comedic quips in the film. Props Mr. Hill, props.
Total Oscars: 4.5

SET/MAKEUP

By Margot_Robbie.jpg: Eva Rinaldi derivative work:
Jbarta (Margot_Robbie.jpg)
[CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

There were definitely some points where I laughed at the realism in the film. For instance, Leo D's character having a house in the Hamptons and living it up almost every weekend. I also really appreciated the fact the Margot Robbie's makeup wasn't ever overdone. She's quite a lovely looking person and I liked that the makeup artists didn't go overboard making her look like a porcelain doll even though she was treated like one in the movie.
Total Oscars: 4

STORYLINE
Jordan Belfort (Leo D) is a man struggling in his first marriage, straight out of college, who just got his first big job working as a broker on Wall Street. He was pretty successful until the giant crash in the 80's, in which he really struggled to make the bills. He ends up building his own stock broker firm with Donnie Azoff (Jonah Hill) and becomes a multi-millionaire. Enter Naomi (Margot Robbi) and now you have a divorce and another marriage. But then Jordan gets investigated by the FBI and his whole life becomes out of control. He has to find a way to make things right or the life he once knew will be out of reach.
Total Oscars: 
4

Oscar Sum: 12.5

As good as this movie is, I cannot give it a full rating because of my amount of dislike towards the amount of f***s said in this film (it actually set a record, just FYI). That and the INSANE amount of drugs will stun you into submission. If I can't handle it, I can't give you warning enough. Seriously.

Movie Review: Wreck It Ralph

Hola hola!

Sorry I haven't been posting stuff lately! I'm currently in a really intensive language program overseas and I have not had time to watch movies because of all of the homework that I have been doing.

I am sooooo sorry!

But thankfully on the way over here, I was able to watch a movie on the plane, Wreck It Ralph.

It was quite honestly one of the cutest movies I have ever seen in a long time! :)

ACTORS
Well, I can't say much about the acting because it was an animated film. But I guess this means I can talk about the animation! It was really well done. Like REALLY well done. And the voice actors were pretty awesome! I loved Sarah Silverman (shockingly; normally I'm not a fan of her material). Her personality matched her character!
Total Oscars: 3.5

SET/MAKEUP
AGAIN, there wasn't really a set to critique because it was animated, but some of the scenes that had to be animated must have been INTENSE in the editing room! There was this one scene where these giant, vicious bugs were attacking these high tech warriors and it was action packed! I'm sure the animators had a fun time putting in all of the frames for everything. There was also this land completely made out of candy and my inner fat kid was screaming for me to go buy a Hershey's bar after watching it.
Total Oscars: 4

STORY LINE
Ralph is this giant character in a video game called "Fix It, Felix." He's the antagonist of the video game and is always smashing the building that Felix, the handyman, has to fix. His video game is one of the most popular in the arcade, but one day Ralph gets tired of being the villain. He just wants to hang out with Felix and his neighbors because they get to do cool stuff. He hears about this medal that will deem him a hero and travels through various video games trying to get the medal, but ends up messing up the story lines of other games along the way. He also makes a friend in Vanellope, a "glitch" in a candy cart racing game and tries to make her biggest dream come true, but there are a lot of issues that come with trying to help a glitch and has to decide if his friendship is worth more than the medal.
Total Oscars: 4

Oscar Sum: 11.5

It really is a cute movie and I encourage you to watch it whenever you have some free time and just want something fresh and light humored to watch! :)

Review # 9: Lincoln

ALAS I HAVE DONE IT.

FOUR SCORE AND SEVEN YEARS AGO I WATCHED LINCOLN.

DDL, enjoying time in the White House.
By Pete Souza (White House (P111512PS-1655)) [Public domain],
via Wikimedia Commons

I'm just kidding! It was actually only like 2 weeks ago, but I just wanted to make a dramatic entrance. *giggles*

Anyways, so so so soooooooo sorry for being so slow on the posts. I've been busy with my 17 credits of school work, here in the States. I feel as if I am going to pass out from exhaustion all the time, but hey, 3 more weeks and then it's summer for me!

To the review!

ACTING
I've always thought Daniel Day Lewis has an oddly shaped head. This time I didn't notice it though because of his rockin'  sideburns and charismatic interpretation of one of the most well known U.S. Presidents of all time. He's chillin with his man chops, Civil war style.
Sally Field was also pretty good. She looked a little too weathered to be playing the wife of Mr. Lincoln, but her acting was pretty good!
and then there's Joseph Gordon Levitt's cameo as Lincoln's son. Yummmmmmmmmm. He looks good in a top hat. That is all.
Total Oscars: 4


SET/COSTUMES
I had a strange craving for cupcakes when I first saw Lincoln and I had no idea why....
Then I realized that Sally Field was drowning in her costume and when she sat down she looked like a wedding cake topper, so my confusion was clarified. She's a petite little thing and should not have been wearing that large of a hoop skirt.
As mentioned before, DDL had the coolest side scratchers in his makeup, so makeup does get props for that.

The sets were pretty cool too! There were a few scenes where Lincoln was riding around in a horse pulled carriage which added a realistic touch to the whole thing
Total Oscars: 3.75 (would have been a 4, but Sally needs to quit walkin in that hula hoop!)

STORY LINE
A movie about Abraham Lincoln's presidency. Not only does it talk about some of his most famous points, but also an inside look as to the man that he really was.
It was fairly chronological so no need to get confused with a bunch of flashbacks.
Total Oscars: 5

OSCAR SUM: 12.75

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go back and watch Joseph Gordon Levitt being a patriotic soldier in a well fitting costume.

Tootle-loo!

 

Movie Review #8: The Switch

By Eva Rinaldi (Jason Bateman)
 [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

Who WOULDN'T want Jennifer Aniston as their longtime best friend? 

Seriously.

It's a pretty good question, right? 

Apparently, Jason Bateman was a little blind at the fact that he had JENNIFER ANISTON AS HIS BEST FRIEND and refused to acknowledge the sheer awesomeness of the situation. But it's okay because it's only a movie and he wouldn't do something like that in real life...We can only hope that he hasn't....

ACTING

Jennifer Aniston = automatic Oscar boost. She's just so glamourous. 

Jason Bateman = awkward guy you have a crush on even though you have no idea why. Automatic Oscar boost.

Plus Thomas Robinson (the little tyke) was just so nerdy I almost adopted him from Jen A. 

It was just so freaking FUNNY. I couldn't stop laughing at how...ungraceful the whole thing was. The whole story line was rather tangled, yet was entertaining at the same time. That's how good the duo was!

Total Oscars: 3.5 

SET/COSTUMES & MAKEUP

By Vennyschull (Own work)
 [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

WELL, it was shot live in NYC (pretty cool...and common). It was pretty modern day, but I have to admit that the decorating for the fertility party was rather hilarious. It's purely indescribable (mostly because I just CAN'T describe the doodads without making it seem entirely disgusting). 

Total Oscars: 3.5

STORY LINE

Kassie (Jennifer Aniston) wants to have a baby before her lady parts run out so she decides to do insemination. She throws a party and lets her donor, Roland, do his business, but her jealous best friend, Wally (Jason Bateman), sabotages the whole thing. Kassie gets preggers then moves away to raise her kid, Sebastian. She and her kid come back a few years later to NYC. Wally screws everything up, Roland is entirely charming and obnoxious, and Sebastian ends up admiring Wally. 

Total Oscars: 3.5

OSCAR SUM: 10. 5

I honestly couldn't stop laughing throughout the whole thing. It's one of those films you watch once and never do it again but tell all your friends about anyways. 

Movie Critique # 6: North Country

College has some perks to it.

Besides the fact that I am getting a head start on my education, some of the classes are pretty interesting. One of the ones that I am signed up for is a women's studies class. I figured it would be a worthwhile elective to take because I am going to be in an industry all about people after all.

One of the MAJOR perks is that I get to watch movies for homework. Now that I can deal with.
This particular film is called North Country. 

Although I would recommend not watching it on Valentine's Day because it's a movie about severe sexual harassment.

Don't do what I did. It makes you feel alone.

ACTING
Charlize Theron is a cray cray lady. Not because she was standing up for herself, but because she was melodramatic about everything. It was seriously frightening. I thought she was way too skinny and her teeth were too white to be working in a mine, but that's just me.
Total Oscars: 3 (the teeth and the perfect shag of her hair in every scene bugged me)

SET/MAKEUP
While there was a lot of soot and smear paint involved in the movie, I felt as if some things were too clean to be there. The counters were too clean in the kitchens and the clothes too perfectly clinging to the women's bodies. I did like how they built the dispensary belts and the towers of the mill. That was pretty cool! I give them props for that.
Total Oscars: 3

STORY LINE
Josey Aimes (Charlize Theron) has to leave her abusive husband to save her and her children's lives. She ends up getting a job at the tactonite mill that her father has worked for most of his life. She's one of the handful of women selected to work at the mill, but she goes through unbearable ridicule and scrutiny from her male colleagues. She ends up filing a lawsuit against the mill because she was not being respected by anyone (not even her father), and her rights as a woman were not being protected. The movie is about her journey of taking the complaint to court.
Total Oscars: 3 (it was a lot to take in)

Oscar Sum: 9

The movie was wayyyyy too repulsive in my opinion. Did I like it? Yes, but it was really depressing to watch and I felt uncomfortable watching these women be tortured as they were. I suppose that was the whole point, but it still makes you paranoid after.

I wouldn't recommend watching this if you are around children or live with much older individuals. The language and sexual content is going to get people riled up. Be careful.

Movie Review # 5: Zero Dark Thirty

I cannot stand violence. Seriously! I don't like wars because a lot of innocent people are killed and the killing just amplifies the problem in the first place. I think action movies are stupid and I am not a fan of Schwarzenegger or Stallone. They always play the same macho roles and it gets super boring.

Sorry Rambo.

But when I went to see Zero Dark Thirty,  I was actually looking forward to it. I like to see stuff based on actual events, especially when the story is about an event that has shaped my life.

ONWARDS.

ACTING
I saw Jessica Chastain in The Help, where she was this little Southern belle just trying to make some friends. I felt so bad for her character in that movie. It was heartbreaking to see her be mistreated so badly.
But in her new film, she kicks burro (I would say the A word, but I don't want it to come back and haunt me. SO Spanish words it is!). She was seriously one of the toughest chicks I have ever seen!
All of the actors had the tension dead on. It was really intense the whole way through. I just can't get over how realistic it was. Almost as if you were watching a documentary!
Total Oscars: 5 

By Tony Shek (Jessica Chastain) [CC-BY-SA-2.0
 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
via Wikimedia Commons

SET/MAKEUP & COSTUME
Hollywood did a pretty risky gamble trying to reenact a historical event. It's a bit hard to recreate embassies and bomb explosions (especially ones where the actual actors are actually close to the explosion). The sets were pretty cool.
But the makeup I disagree on. There was a scene in the beginning where a prisoner was being tortured, and boy it was realistic...minus his clean teeth. Everyone's teeth was sooooo clean. If you live in a dangerous and poverty stricken place, I'm expecting you to be a little grungy every time I see you. Jessica Chastain's hair was too perfect and she never ever looked tired (it's her perfect skin. I am telling you, nothing will ever taint her skin that's how magical it is). Did she look stressed? In some parts, but you never saw her body shrivel from it like a normal person would.
Total Oscar: 3 (everyone was too pretty and clean for a desert)

STORY LINE
Maya (aka Jessica Chastain) is the woman in charge of trying to hunt down Osama Bin Laden. Everyone else eventually gives up on her mission or ends up dying somehow, but she sticks through it all and has to convince some big honchos to let her keep pursuing her mission, even though no one believes her.
Total Oscars: 5 (because it was all so believable)

Oscar Sum: 13 

The best part was that a Navy Seal from the mission actually saw the movie and said she was pretty tough! So I'm guessing that's a good sign. But he also said that it was too melodramatic and there wouldn't be as much noise as the movie suggested. I suppose you'll have to watch for yourself and find out!

Until then, I'm going to start boxing to make me feel BA.

tootles!

Movie Critique # 4: Argo

By Gene Bromberg (benaffleck7-2-1)
[CC-BY-SA-2.0
 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)],
 via Wikimedia Commons

I never thought Ben Affleck could do it. I never took him super seriously as an actor because he just had average roles in average movies, and he never really did anything out of his safety zone.

Boy, was I wrong.

Argo was effing AMAZING.


ACTING
Ben Affleck was the bomb.com. I cannot even explain how amazing he was. He gets an Oscar for growing out his hair.
All of the other people in it were pretty impressive too. Alan Arkin and John Goodman were highly entertaining (*cough Alan Arkin created the greatest one liner EVER cough* You'll know when you see it yourself!).
The actors playing the fugitives were mind blowing as well. I hope none of them were "method" actors because they will NOT be the same after this movie.
Total Oscars: 4

SET DESIGN/MAKEUP

By CIA [Public domain or Public domain],
via Wikimedia Commons

I liked how retro everything was. The hair for the women was fabulous and I have never seen so many men successfully rock thick 'staches. Seriously awesome! They shot a bunch of stuff on location in some country somewhere (it would be pretty hard to build an entire embassy, so I'm guessing they found a building they could use somewhere). Just looking at some of the places they were in gave you chills down your spine because you thought you were gonna die too!
Total Oscars: 4

STORY LINE
Basically, Tony Mendez (Ben Affleck) is a super legit CIA agent that manages to come up with a way to get these Americans out of a hostile Iran. The problem is that the U.S. govt. doesn't really want to go and get them because it would be a very sticky political situation, so Tony Mendez creates a fake film company, makes all of the U.S. fugitives pretend like they are scouting for a location for shooting the film, and has to make them pass Iranian security without tipping anyone off that they are Americans impersonating Canadian filmmakers.
Total Oscars: 5

Oscar Sum: 13

I am not even kidding about the "feel like you're gonna die while watching this." I was in suspense the entire length of the film and that is saying something!
If not, just go and see it for Alan Arkin. He's glorious.

Movie Critique #1: Les Mis

By Photo: Andreas Praefcke (Self-photographed) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

I'll admit it: I cried when I watched it. There were tears streaming down my face, I let the emotions get the best of me, and Anne Hathaway was absolutely breathtaking.

I saw Les Miserables on opening day. Now most of the time, that is a HUGE mistake. Almost every seat was taken and there are often emotionally unstable female counterparts that get riled up or start bawling whenever there is a plot twist.

But this time, I am glad I went on opening day. There were no interruptions, the audience was silent the ENTIRE TIME (which is completely rare considering there are a lot of small children where I live), and all of the audience members were completely drawn to this film.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a WINNER!!!!

But before I begin on the judging, let's create a system of awards, shall we?

The movies will be judged in OSCARS (fitting, no?). I will be judging three aspects of the films: acting, set/costumes & makeup, and story line. There will be a total of 5 Oscars in each category and the maximum score is 15 Oscars. Simple enough, right? Well then, LET'S BEGIN!

ACTING
Having Hugh Jackman in the film automatically gives it an Oscar. He's talented, got the voice of an angel, and he's nice to look at. Anne Hathaway made me bawl, so that deserves some credit! The rest of the cast I was impressed with, except for Amanda Seyfreid. I love her, I do I do, but her part was WAY too high for her register. She sounded shrill in some areas, and that's not good when she's been cast in a main role.
Total Oscars: 3.5 (it would have been a 4, but I can't get over A.S.'s shrilling)

SET/COSTUMES:
Sheer genius, the set designer is.
I was blown away by the details put into the set. There was shredded wood on the floors from explosions, blood staining the set floor, even the hospital looked like a good place to die in. I mean, really?! How is that even possible?!
Total Oscars: 4

STORY LINE
It's quite simple, despite people's belief. I'll lay it out for you: Jean ValJean is an escaped prisoner who manages to become the mayor of a town. Fantine is trying to make money to pay people to take care of her little girl, Cosette. Fantine loses her job and ends up becoming a prostitute and she catches a nasty bug and dies. Her dying wish was for Cosette to be taken care of. So Jean ValJean does. Cosette grows up to be uber pretty and falls in love with Marius, a rebel of the French Revolution. But Cosette and Jean have to move around a lot because his old enemy, JaVer, is out for his hide. Then the rest of the story is about the Revolution and how Marius and Cosette find a way to get back together.

Voila, the story.
Total Oscars: 4 (would have been 5, but the film was wayyyyyyy too long)

Oscar Sum: 11.5 Oscars

Go out and see it if you can! It is a GREAT film, but for the love of holy cheese, buy a coke or something because you will need caffeine to keep you awake! It's almost three hours long!

Au revoir!

Katie